its been awhile....

I apologize for such a long time between posts, just been a busy busy girl. Steve got his leave so we were in ohio from may 24th until last night, we got in from our very long drive at about 730 colorado time. it was a long drive and it sucked but i loved every second that i got to spend with my loves, especially since steves deployment date is coming up very quickly. We had a pretty relaxing trip, we sat around a lot and we also went to my cousins graduation from high school, a friends graduation from basic and a reds game and a graduation party. we had soo much fun though. I am glad to be home also.
Destiny came over for a bit today then i went to the store with her so i could get milk and just catch up, then she and i went to itopit. im sure you are wondering...what the F is itopit....well i will tell you its an amazing frozen yogurt place that has a variety of flavors and a whole bar full of toppings ranging from fruity pebbles to goldfish. anything you can think of, they probably have it. i am obsessed with it and i am hoping that by the time we leave fort carson they are everywhere because we go at least once a week. Zachary (destinys baby) he is 11 weeks old and he is getting soo big even from just 2 weeks ago. i love that little kid, he is so so cute i am excited for the days i will be babysitting when destiny has drill. i love watching little babies grow and interact...and yes before its said....steve and i have talked about another...possibly when he comes home for r&r trying or after deployment is up.
well i know this was short and i never reallly talk about anything but i have to go and clean up dinner mess and then go pick aleasha up at the airport. oh and we need ot get to bed early because im taking scotty to a circus parade tomorrow :) yayyy

Counting down the days...

              I wish i was counting down the days for something exciting, but thats just not the case. Counting down the days until Steve leaves for his deployment. It really sucks but i keep telling myself its only a year, we will be just fine and time will fly. Then i look over at Scotty who is 5 and doesnt quite get whats about to happen? How am i going to make it through this next year comforting him all the while staying strong when he knows everytime something is bothering me. Steve had to go spend a week in the field training last week and he didnt come home at all, and Scotty was bummed about that. How can he grasp the reality of not having his dad for a year, and all he will get are letters and skype calls? My sister sent us some great books, he loves his and i also loved mine. It was very helpful to read from  a woman who was going through it and she could put a comedic spin on things. It was really helpful but i just dont know if there is actually anything that can prepare me for whats about to happen.
            I havent cried or even gotten upset in front of Steve, i dont want him to worry about me or think hes doing something wrong by leaving. I know and he knows he has to and its what we signed up for when he decided to do this and I will always support him 1000 percent. I said the other day to a friend, "oh i think i will be fine, i do well in crappy situations" not sure this is something to be proud of but i do consider myself a strong and independent person and this certainly is a crappy situation but am i strong and independent enough to be both parents for the next year in our sons life? i know i know i keep going back to scotty and how worried i am for him but when it comes down to it, i get whats going on, i get that steve will be gone for a year and i can handle it (i think) and i also get that he is in danger,  but scotty is 5, he doesnt and  he is used to having his dad around. i would give anything to not make him sad a day in his life if i could but i cant and it just brings me back to wondering how we will make it this next year.....
              Well, that is my rant for the day i have to go, i promised i would watch cartoons with scotty and go to the playground so we are off for the day.

Easter

      So today was our first easter alone. No family, just our own and i have to say as sucky as it could have been, it turned out alright! We have met such amazing people out here, they really helped take my mind off of the fact that we were completely on our own this year. I have always wanted to be on our own and do the holiday thing i wont lie, i just didnt think that the first year we could we would be 1200 miles away from family just incase i changed my mind. But to celebrate easter today we woke up, did baskets, had an egg hunt and then we ate and Destiny and her adorable Zachary came and ate with us and then we all went bowling. Steve and her husband got along verrry well which i am glad about :) i really like destiny and its nice to have someone in my life out here who has a kid and understands what that entails, and its nothing bad but you cant really understand unless you have one.
     So then, after bowling, Destiny her husband and son all came over, we were gonna watch a movie but that didnt happen we all ended up just talking and hanging out which is better anyway cause it gave the guys more time to talk and get to know eachother better, Destiny and I have known eachother for awhile through facebook and have hung out a handful of times, but i am glad i have found such a great friend :) Steve has been getting things ready for deployment and by things i mean he has for the past 2 days been putting music and movies on his ipod. I understand why, but isnt there more productive things he could be doing? lol. i love him though :) i am so bummed he has to leave but i have mentally prepared myself for the sendoff i believe, just not the whole deployment yet. Its really going to suck especially all the things he will miss, like scottys first day of school and such but i am blessed that he has gotten to be here for the more important firsts. he will always have a first day of school since he starts a new grade every year, thats me finding a positive, go with it. Well thats all for the day, i am tired and its 10( gosh i am getting so lame) but i am goingto blame it as me being up to do easter bunny things lol. goodbye!

Just another day....

Today was nothing too exciting. I dont really have too many exciting days at the moment just necessities. My new friend Kasey and I did do some exploring on the base, i got a cute new shirt for cheap and some stuff to send out. I am struggling with how Steve and I are going to tell Scotty about the upcoming deployment. Any suggestions? He's 5 and understands when his dad is gone for a long time because it wasnt that long ago he was in basic and we barely got to talk to him. And scotty did well with that but towards the end he did get upset easily so i hope we can explain in a good way and he can understand and handles it well, yes i know thats a lot to ask of a 5 year old. On a more positive note, i am meeting a new friend tomorrow :) her name is Destiny, we got in contact over facebook when Steve was still in basic and have been meaning to get together but the timing never worked too well and finally tomorrow we are meeting for lunch. Its going to help having so many people to talk to and keep me busy while steve is gone knowing they are going through the same thing or have been through it. well i suppose i should go for now, dinner dishes are calling my name....when did i get like this? lol.

Getting Started

Finally! i started this thing. I figued it was a good way to keep in touch with my family back in ohio. I have only planned on doing this for almost a month now. A little about myself...I moved out here at the end of February, my fiance joined the army and moved our son and i out here. It was a hectic move, we had to pack up our lives, say goodbye to our family and be out here..all within 5 days. As crazy as that was, i have never been happier. Colorado is amazing! I was thinking i would hate it, but i never want to leave. Which is silly because if the army has their way, they will be moving us again. It happens and i embrace the change as much as i can. I was worried about scotty and the move out here, he is 5 and we have been around family everyday of his life. He has adjusted so well and we are just in our own routine of things :) I do of course miss my family back home. I have a niece who is turning 13 in may and i cant be there for her birthday, my cousin is graduating high school and going off to college. Big things i am missing out on :( My best friend is having a baby! I am soo excited for her but also a little bummed i am all the way out here :(   I do tend to consume my time with planning our wedding! we were going to try for october but that cant happen...thanks army lol. I have met some amazing ladies out here and even Steve's friends are hilarious and just all around nice guys. Its amazing how close you can become with someone when you are thrown into the same situation. Like i said though, i wouldnt have it any other way. As long as steve thinks this army business is for him i will support him in any way i can. He is the love of my life, and has been since i was 15. Crazy how time flies and i realize how long we have been together! Now back to my family, yes i am aware this is sooo scatter brained but i get to thinking something then Scotty needs something so i walk away and forget where i was and just start some place new, so hang in there, i will try and write these when hes sleeping or not here from now on. I have 2 sisters, one is getting married in february and the other is married and has given me an amazing niece and nephew. My life was normal growing up, and my parents are divorced, yet get along so amazingly well. My mom is remarried and my dad is in a relationship and they all get along, its great yet also weird lol. I am extremely sad that Scotty will be starting kindergarten this year. its going to be hard to accept when i have been with him until now, i was fortunate enough to be able to stay home with him until he starts school which is something i am thankful for everyday! My fiance and i have a dog, her name is Cami. She is a black lab and steve lovesss her lol. She is currently in Ohio because she couldnt fit comfortably in the uhaul but we are hopefully going to pick her up soon! :) Well i am going to go for now, Scotty is bugging me to heat him up some spaghetti! more interesting things to come and hey, maybe even some pictures :) goodnight